Vern's Verbal Vibe

Singer-songwriter/multi-instrumentalist and purveyor of folk 'n' roll: spirit-filled sad songs made better.

August 31, 2008


What are boundaries? Boundaries delineate where we end and others begin, and are essential tools in the development of a healthy, recovered self. The following definitions, which are spot-on in my estimation, appear on a Gaia Community discussion board:

  • The physical boundary has to do with our right to determine how close someone gets to us physically and how they interact with us physically. That can range from how close someone stands or sits to us, to whether we choose to allow a boss to touch our shoulder, to whom we choose to make love with and how.

  • The emotional boundary is about our right to our feelings—without justifying them, without needing to make sense of them. Our feelings belong to us and we have a right to them.

  • The mental boundary has to do with our right to think what we think, and to have our own beliefs and opinions, regardless of whether they're rational, in agreement with the latest statistics, or considered wrong or crazy by an outsider.

  • The spiritual boundary is about our right to our own spiritual beliefs, regardless of how we were raised or what anyone else believes.
I raise this issue because recently, a well-meaning (and dear) friend expressed "concern" over my spiritual beliefs and practices. I gently but firmly pointed out that my relationship with my Higher Power—like that between any individual and the God/Goddess of his or her understanding—is private, personal, and sacred. My choosing to share certain aspects of my spirituality is not to be construed as a veiled invitation to critique.

Labels: ,